I wake up feeling my energy leaching from my very bones; like I’m coming down with something. My mood is no better; I want to cry (and I often do). I feel overwhelmed with “the everything” of it all: work, taking care of the Buddy Man, and everything in between. My symptoms only worsen as the sun fails to show its face day after day, the trees’ brown limbs stark against the pale gray sky. The grass is a wheat brown and the evergreen bushes are technically still green but duller. Dustier. Depressing. We are in the dead of winter here in the Northern Hemisphere and my state of Alabama. I have always loathed this time of year, in spite of the fact that it includes my birthday and my wedding anniversary. I didn’t know what was wrong with me until ten years ago when I was diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder, a type of depression that you experience during particular seasons or times of year.
SAD—isn’t that a fitting acronym?—is characterized by low energy and mood that affects your everyday life. My SAD makes its annual appearance in January, after the holiday lights no longer brighten up the weary landscape and absent of the brightening effects of snow. We get very little snow in Alabama, maybe once every two years or so. SAD lasts until spring starts to make an appearance in mid-March. While some people get seasonal depression during the spring and summer, that is not my experience.
Over the years, I have tried numerous strategies to combat my SAD, like it was an enemy that needed to be conquered. Now, I have accepted it; it is something that I have to deal with yearly. I seek to lessen its impact on my life, and perhaps even find ways to enjoy it. I anticipate Anne’s yearly What’s Saving Your Life post, combing the comments for new strategies to add to my SAD toolkit. I get outside for walks whenever the sun is out. I focus on staying hydrated; it’s easy to forget to drink water in winter since I am not hot and sweaty. I try to be as intentional as I can about my calendar knowing that I am working with less energy. And I’m intentional about scheduling events and activities I enjoy.
It goes without saying that I love books and reading and have found that some books are best suited to my winter months. Here’s a round-up of my favorites that I return to year after year. Perhaps, these can help you ease the winter blues, whether those blues are as drastic as mine or not.
Plants and animals don’t fight the winter; they don’t pretend it’s not happening and attempt to carry on living the same lives that they lived in the summer. They prepare. They adapt. They perform extraordinary acts of metamorphosis to get them through.
—Wintering by Katherine May, page 14
In Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times, Katherine May encapsulates the Winter season, both literally and figuratively. I love how this book is divided up by months beginning with the Prologue: September and ending with the Epilogue: Late March. Released in 2020 and read immediately, I have reread the entire book or portions of it every winter.
You don’t exist to serve your space; your space exists to serve you.
—How to Keep House While Drowning by K.C. Davis, page 7
Performing tasks is challenging while I am in the middle of SAD and, until two winters ago, I shamed myself for not being able to do it all. What changed? I read How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by K.C. Davis. Her gentle approach to maintaining your person and your home was described by an MMD Book Club member as a warm hug. I would add a soothing pat on the back and a whisper in your ear letting you know it’s all going to be ok. Here’s how you can manage.
The only thing we need is to exist. And to hope. Nothing is stronger than a small hope that doesn’t give up.
—The Comfort Book by Matt Haig, page 5
Matt Haig has battled depression on numerous occasions and writes both fiction and nonfiction on the subject. In The Comfort Book, he compiles his own strategies and comforts, including his favorite comfort playlist, to get us thinking about our own. It is quick to dip in and out of and find myself pulling it from my shelves when I need a pick-me-up. Additionally, his Reasons to Stay Alive is the one I turn to when I am feeling particularly low.
the time is always right
—Heart Talk by Cleo Wade, page 153
to remind yourself that you
are going to be okay
the time is always right to love somebody
especially if that somebody is you
From the time has always been now
I am not a huge fan of poetry, but thanks to the MMD Book Club’s exploration of poetry and chat with poet Tanya Runyan, I read more of it than I ever have before. Heart Talk: Poetic Wisdom for a Better Life by Cleo Wade, a little volume about matters of the heart, is a nice way to dip your toe in. Opening to any page will offer a reminder to prioritize my heart and spirit which is exactly what I need when I am feeling low.
Sometimes books don’t find us until the right time.
—The Storied Life of AJ Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin
I have read The Storied Life of AJ Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin twice, each time during the winter season. It’s a heart-warming tale, set in a bookstore, which makes me feel like the world is not as bad as it seems and that there is a reason to live. I feel all the emotions while reading, something highly recommended for depressives. Feel free to substitute your own feel-good novel here.
It is enough to exist in this world and marvel at it. You don’t need to justify that, or earn it.
—Becky Chambers
Long-time readers will know that I LOVE Becky Chambers’s Monk & Robot series. Often described as “a warm hug of a book”, I reread one of the two books every New Year’s Day, switching back and forth from year to year. They start my year off right, encouraging me to be kind and gentle as I move through this season. The dedication reads “For anyone who could use a break.”
Expectations are infinite. Time is finite. You are always choosing. Choose well.
Juliet’s School of Possibilities by Laura Vanderkam
When I’m ready to think about and plan for the future, Juliet’s School of Possibilities: A Little Story About the Power of Priorities by Laura Vanderkam really gets me in the mood. I feel inspired by the possibilities of a new season and plan to approach it with intentionality.
What are your favorite books to read this time of year? Any recommendations for me? Please share in the comments.
P.S. 3 books to help you understand and manage anxiety.
About the author
Shannan Malone is the MMD Cohost and Contributor. Her go-to genre depends on her mood! You can find Shannan on Instagram @shannanenjoyslife.
60 comments
I love this list and think it’s time I tried the Monk and Robot series even though some other Becky Chambers didn’t work for me.
Shannon, I would also recommend SARK books for the winter season – really any of them are good but Eat Mangoes Naked and Transformation Soup are a couple that I loved. They are colourful, supportive, mood-boosting books.
Thank you, Tracey, for the recommendations. I will check them out.
Excellent material you shared, Miss S, with many helpful suggestions. The rain soaked days can really get to us! Thank you for opening your heart about this all too common but frequently ignored mindset.
You are most welcome, Debbie. Thank you for commenting.
Shannen! ❤️ What an encouraging post! Thanks so much for sharing your experiences, strategies and best of all the books that help you cope. Going to pull Matt Haig’s Comfort Book off my shelf right now…great reminder of hope for this dreary Monday morning in the depth of winter.
I love this. Thank you Julia!
Hey wintertime companions –
Here’s 9 books to calm, heal, and inspire you as we make our way through this gray and chilly season. And a bonus scrapbook of ‘blues’ snapshots to bring a smile.
http://www.lindastoll.net/2021/11/10-exceptional-books-to-calm-heal.html
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and your list with us, Shannan. I will definitely look into your recommendations. I especially appreciated the quotes that you included. 🤗 Even with the cold and dark, some flowers are beginning to push their way out of the ground! Every day is a day closer to Spring!
We debated whether to include the quotes, Karen. I’m glad you appreciated them. Thank you for letting me know.
The quotes are fantastic and provide a little takeaway for my journal.
Thank you so much for this beautiful post! Your determination to live your best life in the midst of SAD is a motivator to me to take more rigorous steps for myself! I have finally realized that I have to set aside all the serious, dark, sometimes anxiety producing books I enjoy the other parts of the year. Now the only books that I read are fun, like Road to Roswell (thank you, MMD), The Windsor Knot by SJ Bennett, a fun mystery with Queen Elizabeth running the sleuthing action, and quite a bit of re-reading favorite books that always warm my heart.
You’re welcome, Jennifer. Thank you for reading.
Shannan, I love this! One of my favorite non-bookish ways to combat SAD is top of my mind as we just did it – my husband and I started a tradition a few years ago of hosting a small group of friends for Soup Night (or Soup Bowl as someone called it this year) It’s my favorite January thing. Everyone brings a pot of soup and we basically get to have soup flights and stuff ourselves with six or so varieties of soup/chilli and lots of bread and desserts, talk and laugh for as long as we want, and then everyone can take home Tupperware containers of other soups. For several days afterward we all have cozy soup leftovers. I start a group chat a little in advance to make sure everyone is aware of dietary restrictions so they can label nonconforming ingredients and as host I make sure there are options to cover everyone. It’s the best.
That sounds so fun. I love soup!
Oh my gosh – I love this!!!
What a great idea! Definitely going to try this.
Cara, that sounds like fun but it sounds overwhelming to me, too. One of the things I have to keep reminding myself is that the effort generally is worth the reward. Although, I often don’t see it at the time. Thank you for reading.
Thanks Shannan, this is a great post. Through SAD season, reading can be such a saving grace. I also use a SAD light while I have my morning coffee. Mine is a small Phillips brand, but there are lots out there. I swear by it from late October to April.
Sue, I have a SAD light. It’s really old though. I haven’t really seen any great benefits from it but it is true I might not be using it as effectively as it could be. What have you found makes it work for you? How do you use it? Thanks for sharing.
I have a light also and use it faithfully every morning first thing for a half hour. We live in Vancouver, Canada on the west coast and the days are short and gray all winter long. The light is a lifesaver.
This is a wonderfully timed post. I also deal with depression and found the SAD symptoms were lessened when I moved north from Florida to Iowa where there are more distinct seasons. I have also lived The Little Book of Hygge for finding ways to lean into winter and the differences in the seasons.
And here I am trying to figure out how to move to Florida to lessen my SAD, Kristelle. LOL Ah well! What works, works, I guess. Thank you for reading.
Thank you, Shannan, for sharing your experience with SAD. I have summer SAD; in San Diego, we get a marine layer that can last from May through July, and it’s just days and days of fog. I’ve lived here for 30+ years and have never gotten used to it, but maybe the approach of just accepting it is the way to go. I’m saving your post for my summer SAD. I love the idea of just leaning into it and reading.
I have been to San Diego a few of times (family in the area) and yes, that “June Gloom” (that’s how they describe it) is a real thing. The first time I went, I was unaware of it and was very confounded. I was looking forward to “sunny San Diego” and it was not there. Hope the post is beneficial at that time. Thank you for commenting.
This is such a wonderful (and much needed!) post. The past two winters I have found myself diving deep into fantasy series, which surprised me at first. I used to say I wasn’t a big fantasy reader! Last year it was the first four books in The Wheel of Time series, and so far this year it has been the Dragonriders of Pern series. It’s comfort reading, and I don’t need to think about what to read next. I just reach for the next book in the series.
Kelly, fantasy and sci-fi reads are fast becoming my go-to during this time of year. Thank you for commenting.
Based on my geography, winter is the pleasant season (despite less daylight) and the hot, humid summer is when we hibernate in the air-conditioning between sunrise and twilight. I feel as though I have SAD in reverse — is summer affective disorder a thing? I will save these suggestions for when it is too stinking hot to get out of my chair.
Yes, Allyson. SAD during summer is a thing! Hope the post is helpful to you then.
Thank you!!! I plan to read all of these. I hope you feel better as the days get longer. I always remind myself that every day after the winter solstice is one minute more of daylight. It’s sunny here in Piney Creek, NC, today. What helps me during the winter months is to get outside and walk with the intention of finding something beautiful to photograph with my iPhone. This has helped me to appreciate beauty being available in every season. Just 20 minutes a day.
We’re expecting pretty much a full week of rain here, so I’m feeling pretty low. Thank you for these suggestions.
Today is the only day of sun this week, for us as well, and I am not looking forward to it. I am headed out of doors for a walk as soon as I finish responding to these comments to soak up all the sun that I can. Best wishes for us all.
I don’t have SAD, but my mother does, so she’s pretty dreary now, and I have to keep that in mind. What surprises me more, having never lived in the south, is your description of Alabama in winter! I thought Alabama was Deep South, and therefore would have sunny days, green grass and warmth in the winter! Cooler than summer, but still warm. What you describe actually sounds like Maine! We have little snow these last 10-15 years, dull grass, stark trees and gray skies, although February is usually a little sunnier. It’s 24 F today, so I bit cold, but often it is not freezing, we have a lot of slush and mud. It feels like weather is evening out across the country! Sometimes Texas and northern Florida are colder than Maine!
I too, have had this in years past and never really experienced it until we moved to Colorado, which has a proper winter (snow starts in October, really picks up around Christmas, and can last until May). We actually get a lot of sun here between storms and it is quite beautiful. However, being a Southern girl, the stark, long, cold winters took some getting used to. I used to always feel like I was “coming down with something” but the illness would never materialize. Lethargic, icky, and …SAD.
Now, I have kind of figured out some things that help: getting outdoors for exercise (especially with friends) staying busy (started working again after my 3 kids got older), and …staying busy. That was a game-changer for me. Also, entertaining even though we have a small house and have to all be indoors and appreciating the slower months where I’m not doing yard/garden/home maintenance.
I’m reading comments too because people can have great advice – thank you for sharing yours!
Take care!
xx
Jenny in Cold Colorado
Thank you, Jenny! I have been trying to stay busy, curating and organizing my home library. That helped for a while. I appreciate your sharing. It is so nice reading the comments and realizing that I am not alone.
I have a mild case. I don’t mind the cold so much but a couple of gray days in a row do bring me down. I’m also in Alabama. Walks outside help and I am trying a daily dose of red light therapy this winter.
I don’t suffer from this disorder – in fact, the gloomier things are, the more I like them! However, I’ve already shared this list with my friends who are so afflicted. What I’m throwing out is that I need sort of a similar list during those HOT, ENDLESS Texas summers. During the summer, I need to read books that will make me focus on cold things (Frozen River would be a great example). Keep this tucked into your pocket for a future post!
We’ve already got you covered! Cool down this summer by reading these novels set in cold places https://modernmrsdarcy.com/novels-set-in-cold-places/
Hi Claire!
I would suggest Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier, Snow Country by Yasunari Kawabata, Polar Star by Martin Cruz Smith, The Snow Child by Eowyn Ivey, How the Penguins Saved Veronica by Hazel Prior, Winter Garden by Kristin Hannah, Winter’s Bone by Daniel Woodrell, Eye of the Needle by Ken Follett, and The Kept by James Scott.
Hi Shannan!
Thanks for sharing your list of books and your experiences. Some of these are on my TBR. Long ago a friend told me something that has stuck with me whenever I start feeling like my housekeeping skills are not “enough”. She was retired and said, “When you are working, you don’t keep house. The house keeps you”.
Here are some books that made me laugh/or felt like a hug: The Littlest Library by Poppy Alexander, The Unlikely Escape of Uriah Heep by H.G. Parry, The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared by Jonas Jonassan. These books provided me with an escape into another world: The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern andThe Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix Harrow.
Katie, I read the STARLESS SEA and couldn’t understand it. LOL But TEN THOUSAND DOORS is a fav. Thank you for these other suggestions. I will check them out.
I loved the 100 Year Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window. Thanks for the reminder, I’m going to pull it out and read it again!
Thank you for this post! I loved Wintering and I look forward to reading How to Clean House While Drowning. I have a friend that I think would love the Matt Haig book. January was a grey dreary month in the Northeast. We’re getting a stretch of sunny days this week with some gradual warming. Winter really is a challenge. Hang in there!
Thanks Shannon for this post and your beautiful transparency. I feel like your insights could be applies to any kind of depression…I loved the quotes and that they give us permission to do the best we can with no guilt or shame. I too, loved Wintering by Katherine May and found her explanations of hibernating and prepping as a normal tool found in animals and in certain cultures to be so encouraging. You have made us feel like we are not alone. Thank you for this! Happy Reading!
You are welcome, Stephanie. Happy reading!
This finds me at just the right time, thank you for sharing. All of these recommendations are new to me except Wintering. I look forward to looking into each of these and will share this post with my daughter. We also live in North Alabama. 🙂
I first heard of the cleaning book here. It met me in a difficult season of life with small kids and i appreciated her honesty. One of my favorite winter strategies is to follow the Polish tradition of keeping Christmas til Feb 2. So lights and cheer in a modified form til then. My neighbor says she looks up the hill each night to see our over the top outside light display click on.
I am considering how to keep up some lights through February without it appearing too Christmasy. I think I need to look for some ideas on Pinterest or something. Thank you for commenting.
A play that touched me deeply is also a book. Enchanted April begins in dreary, rainy London, but concludes in the sun at a villa somewhere in the Mediterranean. Lovely tale of a woman’s dream that finally becomes reality and touches those around her.
Thank you Shannan, you are so wonderful! I hear you about SAD and have felt so similar to you at times. Thank you for your eloquence on a difficult topic. I am thrilled to try all of you wonderful suggestions. I didn’t see it mentioned, but I have a Happy Light. It is very helpful to me to sit with the light on for a few to several minutes and read when the days have little to no sunlight. I appreciate your heartfelt column and advice.
Shannan, thank you for this wonderful list and for addressing such an important topic. So many of us suffer from SAD and yet it can feel so isolating when we don’t talk about it. I just finished Wintering and found it to be so beautiful and comforting. I have added Matt Haig’s books to my list and look forward to reading them. A couple of my “go-to” books that I reread when I’m going through a rough time are When Things Falls Apart by Pema Chodron and Belonging by Toko-Pa Turner. Thanks again for this comforting post.
I am surprised to hear that even as far south as Alabama you can have SAD but I suppose sunlight is everything. I live in Minnesota, and while we have gray days we have many winter days with brilliant sunshine. I was recently in Sweden and struck by the lack of sunshine and only 6 hours of daylight. We all need coping strategies. Mine has been to knit cozy things and get more sleep. This year with El Nino we have had a surreal winter, with no snow and extremely warm temperatures (for MN).
Thank you, Shannan, for your honest, relatable words. I unfortunately suffer from treatment resistant major depression and changing of seasons can add another layer to that. Your post is certainly helpful for other types of depression beyond SAD (or for anyone who just doesn’t like winter!). I have found How to Keep House While Drowning so helpful and always connect with Matt Haig’s writing. I, too, am not a fan of poetry, but two I have found helpful are Every Word You Cannot Say by Iain S. Thomas (this one really spoke to me, such that I’ve purchased various copies!) and Depression & Other Magic Tricks by Sabrina Benaim. Other helpful reads I’d add include Blue Nights by Joan Didion, Leap In by Alexandra Heminsley, Darkness Visible by William Styron, Why Has Nobody Told Me this Before by Dr. Julie Smith, Feeling Good by Dr. David Burns, and The Self-Care Year by Alison Davies. Take care of yourselves, everyone!
I tend to re-read during SAD season – mostly Agatha Christie’s and other mystery series like Kate Ellis and Elly Griffiths. Returning to favourite characters is comforting.
During this season I try to embrace the outdoors – get outside every day no matter what. Walk in the rain or snow! I find looking at trees and listening to birds really comforting.
Shannon, one of the best posts ever! And I don’t mind winter too much. Thank you, excellent.
I saved the notification of this in my inbox for a week, and today was exactly the day I needed to read it. Thank you, Shannan!
Thank you Shannan, this is exactly what I needed.
This is so beautiful!
Thank you Shannan!
Those daylight lamps for SAD really work…at least for me. I just started using one in the morning on cloudy days. Drug stores sell them in their medical equipment department and not expensive. Worth a try!
Thank you so much for sharing, Shannan. I also have a really hard time during the winter. I am going to look up Matt Haig’s work asap. I also lean hard into fantasy/sci fi during the winter, and I’ve also found that re-reading books that remind me of the beauty in the world or that somehow remind me of the transcendent or of something wise really helps me remember the world outside my downturned emotions. Expands my perspective. Some books that do this for me are Pilgrim at Tinker Creek by Annie Dillard, Gilead by Marilynne Robinson, and Jayber Crow and Hannah Counter by Wendell Berry.
Wow. This list was so helpful. I already had some of the books so I knew I’d like the others. Read Storied Life of AJ Fikry in just a few days. It was a balm. Thank you!