To paraphrase Wesley’s lament in The Princess Bride, true perfection is rare in this world. But alongside heart-stopping sunsets, warm cocoa on a snowy day, and the perfect summer read, I’d argue there’s a place for Trader Joe’s Everything But the Bagel (EBTB) seasoning.
To say I’m a fan is an understatement. I’m a devotee. My mornings are incomplete without eggs or avocado toast covered in EBTB. Dinner leftovers transform into lunchtime masterpieces with a sprinkle of its poppy and sesame seed magic. Roasted broccoli, covered in soy sauce and a generous shake of this star of the spice cabinet, is devoured by my entire family.
But what makes this culinary treat—a humble mixture of poppy seeds, sesame seeds, garlic, onion, and salt—so captivating? Is it nostalgia, the glow of Sunday mornings spent picking up fresh bagels on my bike? Perhaps it’s a touch of pride, a knowing nod to the wider world embracing this deeply Jewish flavor. Or maybe it’s the perfect harmony of salty pops and satisfying crunches, a textural and tastebud marriage made in heaven?
But perhaps “perfection” is too strong a word to use. Because let’s be honest, the full Trader Joe’s moniker is a mouthful. Can we agree “Everything Bagel Seasoning” rolls off the tongue a tad easier than “Everything but the Bagel Seasoning?” Yes? Good.
More importantly, EBTB is the seasoning equivalent of glitter. It elevates everything, but oh, the mess! Sesame seeds become permanent residents under my kitchen table, and my nightly counter wipe-down is primarily focused on cleaning up stray bits of the seasoning. Now, I wouldn’t dream of suggesting the spice wizards at Trader Joe’s tinker with the formula. Its magic is undeniable. But perhaps a touch of mess-minimizing fairy dust could be sprinkled into the mix? After all, if anyone can achieve the seemingly impossible, it’s the folks who brought us “Everything But the Bagel” seasoning in the first place.
Speaking of which, let’s acknowledge the sheer genius of the good folks at Trader Joe’s who are constantly expanding this flavor profile beyond the spice jar. TJ’s EBTB nut duo is a snacking revelation, and the EBTB chips? Delicious, especially with a dollop of (you guessed it) EBTB yogurt dip. I’m even contemplating venturing into the EBTB lox territory, despite my usual aversion to smoked salmon. Honestly, I wouldn’t bat an eye if EBTB ice cream materialized on shelves – because you know, when it does, my freezer will be eagerly waiting.
And don’t we need some messiness in our lives? A floor covered in EBTB is not only a delight for my dog, who is more than happy to help clean up, but also a testament to a life vibrantly lived. It’s a joyful reminder of family gathering to nourish both body and soul. Sure, the sheet pans might require some extra TLC after the broccoli feast, but those leftover, crispy bits are my secret snack, savored once the little ones are tucked in. Like any good party, an EBTB-infused dinner ends with a post-celebration wind-down, sweeping away the remnants to relaxing tunes. All in preparation for the next adventure, likely starting with a fresh sprinkle of my beloved seasoning come morning.
So, while perfection might be elusive, EBTB offers a taste of something close, with a sprinkle of messiness thrown in for good measure. It’s a testament to the power of bold flavor and culinary innovation, a reminder that sometimes, the most humble ingredients can become our pantry heroes. And hey, if the trade-off for flavor nirvana is a few stray sesame seeds, I’m more than willing to make that bargain. Just, you know, maybe with a vacuum cleaner handy.
Are you an EBTB devotee? What’s your favorite seasoning blend? Please dish in the comments.
P.S. Check out our team’s whole Raving Fans series right here.
About the author
Sara Aeder is our What Should I Read Next Community Manager. Her go-to books include gentle and witty fiction, pop culture essays, and humorous and twisty whodunnits.
26 comments
Your mention of the dog’s delight at clean-up duty brought back a great memory for me. My elderly mother and I were at a baby shower. The mom-to-be was opening gifts and held up the new item she received. My mom said, “What IS that?” I told her it was a splat mat. “What’s it for?”, she asked. I explained people put them under their high chairs to catch messes. Mom said, with complete seriousness, “Oh. I didn’t need one of those. I had a dog!” 😆❤️
Ellen, it is so true. My dog serves a vital clean up role in this house! Thank you Jed!
Sara, great post! I also agree that EBTB is just delish! We are huge fans of everything bagels and this seasoning captures the essence. We’ll add it to eggs and of course to bagels w whitefish salad. We are also fans of Trader Joe’s Chili Lime Seasoning Blend. I’m a big citrus fan and I love the tang in this seasoning mix. Will put it on chicken breast before and after grilling, taco meat and a dash in a vinaigrette.
Thanks Jill! I never let a new TJ seasoning mix pass me by. We buy them all, but so far, nothing compares to the GOAT–EBTB.
My daughter and I are planning a trip to Trader joe’s – one more item added to the list!
Please share Sara’s go-to books….they sound lovely!
Hope you enjoy it Jennifer!
Some of my favorites—non-fiction essays by Chuck Klosterman and Nick Hornby (especially 10 Years in the Tub) for witty pop culture essays, This is How it Always is by Laurie Frankel and Anxious People by Fredrick Backman for witty fiction, and the Hawthorne and Horowitz series by Anthony Horowitz and the Ernie Cunningham series by Benjamin Stevenson for Whodunnits.
Sara–what an expressive treatise on EBTB seasoning– Such fun and hope to see more of your writing in the future!
Thanks Megan!
I hear you! I married into a Jewish family and what a revelation! A favorite family breakfast is lox and bagels. I did not know cream cheese, tomato and onion are part of this deal. BTW, that’s basically it for eating the rest of the day. My favorite is, you guessed it the everything bagel. Mazel tov!
It’s the perfect way to start the day! I personally lean tuna, but as long as it’s on an everything bagel (and like, a good bagel), we are set.
100%!!!! It’s an absolute MUST on the Trader Joe’s Grocery List. Can’t be without it. I sprinkle it on avocado toast and then put Trader Joe’s Micro Greens on top! Soooooo good 🙂
My 9 year old is obsessed with the microgreens 😋
I agree with the others:
please share your books, especially “gentle and witty,”
I’d like to read more of your writing,
and now excuse me while I go make breakfast with some EBTB.
Thanks Kitty! My go to gentle witty authors are Fredrik Backman, Laurie Frankel, and Nick Hornby.
Everything But the Bagel on plain hummus!! Grab the pretzels!
Julie—it is shocking to me that TJ’s has not made this a product yet!
Big Y (a New England grocery store) has Everything Hummus and it’s amazing. Schmear it on a pita with some chopped tomatoes and cucumbers and you have the perfect lunch!
I admit a certain obsession with the Trader Joe’s Onion Salt. My Midwest version of EBTB. I have to drive a few hours to get to a TJ’s, so I have a backstock of at least a half-dozen jars at all times to ensure I don’t run out. I put it on my pasta, my eggs, my pizza, my vegetables, my chicken, my steak, my pretty much everything. I haven’t tried it on ice cream yet, but I won’t be surprised if that’s where I end up.
LOL- as an onion hater, I wish they’d make an onion-free version b/c I like everything else in it! I have tried it but to me the onion is overwhelming.
Have you seen the new “Mini (almost) Everything Bagel Sandwich Crackers with cream cheese filling”? Delicious! (Not GF though)
Since I’m not fond of onions or garlic, my go to is Trader Joe’s Furikake seasoning. It’s a Japanese seasoning made with seaweed, sesame seeds and salt. I like it because it doesn’t have sugar or other additives like some versions of furikake. I use it where you would use EBTB.
We have severe sodium restrictions in our household, so EBTB is out. But we are huge fans of TJ’s “21” seasoning. This is a blend of- you guessed it- 21 herbs and spices. But NO salt. It adds incredible flavor to just about everything. Since we have to travel to St. Louis or Kansas City to shop at Trader Joe’s, it is not unusual for us to buy at least a half a dozen jars at a time.
We have to travel with a ziplock of EBTB because both of the kiddos request it so often!
No Everything bagels at Aldi this week, so I got plain 🙂 Butter, generous sprinkle of EBtB, toaster oven. Maybe even better?
Jeni’s did do an everything bagel ice cream, I believe!
They do! I tried it one year, not for me but fun to give it a go!