Reevaluating my relationship with my phone and social media

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I have mixed feelings about my phone. It can help me be super productive and keep me connected with family and friends. On the other hand, I dislike feeling like I have wasted time thanks to social media algorithms. These hot and cold feelings have led me to reevaluate my relationship with my phone and social media. 

Does anyone else feel like their phone has become a sci-fi super computer? Everyday I carry around a combo of KITT from Knight Rider, a Star Trek communicator, Professor X’s Cerebro, C-3PO, and Skynet from The Terminator in my pocket, which is pretty rad. (Well maybe not the Skynet part.) Since it has so many uses, I feel like I can’t go without it. I am constantly reaching for my iPhone to check the weather or use the calculator or look something up real quick. All these applications and uses add up to the device being in my hand or my pocket for most of my day. I got my first smart phone in 2009 and it’s wild how indispensable it feels now. Every upgrade and new feature makes using it less feel harder to accomplish. 

A big portion of the time I spend on my iPhone is social media scrolling. Using Instagram has opened up a world of awesome tips, delicious recipes, excellent travel recs, and most importantly, fantastic connections with fellow readers. I am really grateful for these things. Yet, viewing and interacting takes time and that doesn’t even include the hours I have gotten sucked into silly suggested videos and overwhelming news. Often I open the app with the intention of sharing a great book I have read or a fun restaurant we visited but then I end up scrolling and POOF 30 minutes have gone by without me even posting. My app of choice is Instagram but you can fill-in-the-blank with any social media here. Finding that perfect balance is tough! 

My on-going goal is to use my phone like a futuristic time-saving magical device. Instead of feeling like I spend too much time on my iPhone or Instagram, I want these tools to quickly work for me so they can simplify my life while keeping me connected and organized. I am talking about more moments focused on my kids, husband, family, and friends instead of my phone. Having additional hours to read. Reorganizing my own kitchen instead of watching creators on Instagram work on their pantry and fridge.

Figuring out how to achieve this technological dream has been a journey. I first tried removing the app from my phone’s home screen and even deleting it entirely. Unfortunately, that didn’t work for me. I often chat with friends through Instagram and use it to update the schedule for Pottery Book Club, so having regular access is important. That made redownloading it each time a hassle. I have also tried putting my phone in another room out of reach. While that cut down on the amount of time on my phone in general, it didn’t stop the rabbit holes I would fall down in from my Instagram feed once I had my paws back on my phone. 

Team member Leigh takes Sundays off social media. This would be fabulous but I haven’t been able to use this technique since we normally spend our weekends at various kid events or traveling. I want to take photos, look up directions, and research stops. Something I haven’t even thought to try is one of Ginger’s many strategies: a phone jail. After hearing how much that has helped her, I can’t wait to order one for our family dinners. Yet I don’t think this tip will work for me at other times of the day because I am physically utilizing my phone for so many things in addition to social media like our family calendar, streaming music, and various reading apps.

One technique that has been turning my phone into a futuristic time-saving magical device is a solution I find equally innovative. I’ve been aware of Brick for a while but I wasn’t inspired to order one for myself until I saw a friend from Bookstagram purchase one. A Brick is a small magnet embedded with an NFC tag that you can place anywhere. I have kept mine on the fridge, in the car, on my washing machine, and even on my headboard. Using Brick’s app, I set up a few different modes that block or allow the items I choose. When I want to start a mode, like my “off the ‘gram” one that blocks Instagram, I go to the app to brick my phone. Then if I want to check my Instagram messages or look up new places on the app when we travel, it just takes tapping my phone to the Brick to instantly have access again. Abracadabra! I know the tech is pretty simple but I am truly amazed every time it works.  

Since I started using mine about 6 months ago, my relationship with both my phone and social media have changed. I still use Instagram for all sorts of things but the time I spend on it is more manageable and focused. I keep the app “bricked” most of the time and that helps break my automatic tendency to open it anytime I pick up my phone to check a text or missed call. It is still there; I just can’t access it as easily as before. A delightful side effect is that blocking Instagram has also led to less time on my phone overall. It seems that breaking the habit of often opening that one app throughout the day has reduced me reaching for my phone at all.

Best of all, I have gained more time to connect in person with my family and friends. Feeling less distracted and more present has been great because I am always striving to live more in the moment. I have also spent more time at night reading when I would have been scrolling instead. In fact, one of my modes is for “reading only”, and still allows me to use bookish apps like The Storygraph and Libro.fm, plus the option to google interesting tidbits I stumble across in the pages. 

My friend whose Brick purchase inspired me to try it out has not had the same success. She works remotely and has found it is too easy to simply tap her phone in her small home and start scrolling again. I haven’t had this issue in our small house because I am like Dory from Finding Nemo and frankly forget that it’s an option sometimes. I do think the Brick works best if I place the magnet in a strange location, like the metal leg of a chair in the other room. Sort of like an “out of sight, out of mind” disappearing act. Even better, if I am away from home and can’t just tap it open again. I never remember to tap my phone before leaving the house. Luckily the app has 5 emergency unbricks that can be replaced after requesting more. Reader, I bet you can figure out how I know this! 

Establishing better boundaries with social media and my phone thanks to this ingenious little tool has been a game-changer. Anne just recently started using a Brick as well and is surprised by how much she likes it, because she didn’t think she “needed” it that much. (If you would like to try a Brick for yourself, you can get 10% off with the code ANNEBOGEL.)

In addition to the Brick, I plan on trying some other strategies. First, I want to gather an analog bag full of screen-free items like Donna and Ginger have done. I am also going to learn how to set up some nifty automations and shortcuts on my iPhone. If you have any tips and tricks to share, I am all ears. 

Please share how you balance social media and screentime in the comments below. After all, we all deserve a phone that can be a futuristic time-saving magical device.

P.S. How I find time to read, The most important items in my travel tech kit, and 21 spine-tingling but not TOO scary audiobooks for fall.

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